ok, so back to gettin' real. last week was a flop. this week was not. i did however discover that i have gained back 2 of the 4 pounds i lost... sad, sad day. i got three good workouts in and walked with nuggie every day. i ate pretty well - no oreo cookie binges or giant bag of m&m's stuffed in my mouth b/c nuggie won't nap EVER and i needed a little sanity in my life, so why NOT look for it in candy, right?!? NO - there was none of that this week. but like i said, i did hop back on that scale and found i had gained back 2 pounds. ugh. that's when i asked myself - how much am i really committed to losing this baby weight? how important is it to me? is that moment of weakness and stuffing junk food in my body really worth the sadness i feel when i still don't fit into any of my old jeans? being self conscious about my extra tummy chub? worrying about my fat face in pictures? and if i'm really gettin' real - feeling totally uncomfortable letting my hubby see me, well you know - sans apparel? no, the food isn't worth it.
all i can do is take it one day at a time though. i've said that before. and i'll say it again. i can't set myself up on some rigid diet or crazy workout plan - it doesn't work for me. but for today i'll try to get my workout done, eat healthy foods and drink lots of water. but i want to remember - what's really important? and is it worth it?
on a happier note - though the scale didn't bring happy news - i can now where MY belt again - rather than bub's. i can also get all my old jeans - except for my one pair of lucky brand most fav fav skinny jeans :-( - up over my fat booty - just can't button them yet. but that's huge! a tiny bit of movement in the right direction helps... makes me feel like i will indeed lose this last 18 pounds someday.
ok - busy, busy day tomorrow... i'm watching a sweet friend's two little girls and my own screamy monkey all day tomorrow. her girls will be angels i have no doubt. mine will probably pitch a fit the whole day. someone remind me how many calories are in vodka?? mama is gonna need a cocktail late tomorrow night!
4 comments:
Remember muscle weighs more than fat! You'll gain some weight before you start losing some..keep it up your doing great!
According to "my fitness pal", a shot of vodka is only 69 calories!! I had to add that the other night...I was having a wild evening. :)
I feel your pain girl. Sometimes you need that sugar just to cope. Remember your baby is only what 5 months? At 10 months I could still just barely fit in my shorts (and never in my jeans) and then well you know - preggers with Sam and do you think I can fit into my jeans now - 10 months postpartum? Nope. It makes me mad and ashamed sometimes (well a lot of the time) but I think, when the kids get a bit bigger, when the weather gets warmer, I will get back on track. Rome wasn't built in a day, my sister always says. I think, well, I was really thin once but I sure didn't have the most wonderful miracles in my life in my arms - So, it's a trade off for now. Until then, living one day at a time - some days I succeed and others I fail.
Bub doesn't see "tummy chub." He sees the gorgeous woman that gave him his beautiful daughter. Trust me.
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